After three months of getting to know my little bundles of joy I’ve come to realize how magnificently different they are from one another. When we found out we were having twins I could never in my wildest dreams have … Continue reading
I am long overdue for a new post – it’s been three months since my two pumpkins arrived in October! Life sure has been busy in the Benson household. The first couple of months was a total blur of feedings, diapers changes, visitors … Continue reading
My three year old and I were playing outside last weekend catching leaves that were falling from the trees. His belly laughs broke through the silence of a quiet Saturday afternoon and we were both smiling from ear to ear. We hadn’t shared … Continue reading
The twins have arrived! On Sunday, October 12th I woke up to incredibly intense contractions. Two days prior I had learned that I was 3cm dilated and 80% effaced so we all knew that they could arrive at any time. I took … Continue reading
Sometimes the small teaching moments with our kids can become “ah-ha” moments of our own. I stumbled upon one of these today. Cole was having a typical three year old tantrum before naptime. When I finally got him into his bed he wanted to talk about all the things that made him sad. He’d had plenty of time to feel what he felt and now I wanted to help him move on from it.
“Cole, instead of talking about the things that make you sad, let’s talk about the things that make you happy.”
As he started to share his happy list with me (his stuffed animal Piggy…ice pops…Caillou…etc.) a light bulb went off in my head.
I’ve always been pretty good at shining a happy face out to the world, but behind closed doors I’m not always all that happy. The truth is I’ve been pretty overwhelmed since finding out we are having twins. Most people have their fabulous times and challenging times and this is just one of those challenging times! I need to take the advice that I gave to my three year old. Instead of focusing on the things that make me sad and overwhelmed I need to make more of an effort to remind myself of the things that make me happy. Although my list definitely doesn’t include Caillou, I certainly have a lot to be thankful for and long line of things that make me happy, starting with these two handsome guys!
Grateful for these teaching moments. I sure do learn a lot…and hope he does too 🙂
I’m sure I’ll be able to relate to this snarky meme even more once the twins arrive, but it still strikes a chord with me now. For the moms of more than one child out there – how many times did you hear the words “Every pregnancy is different…” uttered from friends, family, and even strangers. A lot, right? I had no idea how true that would turn out to be.
My pregnancy with Cole was pretty easy on my body. Emotionally, I was a train wreck because there were complications that came up related to his health. That’s another story for another day. My twin pregnancy has been just the opposite. I’m totally psyched that they’ve been growing well and looking perfectly healthy. But man oh man has it been tough on my body! The reason I want to share my challenges is not to complain, but to hopefully help another mom who experiences something similar. Sometimes, it’s nice to be reassured you’re not alone!
The nausea started around 5 weeks. Being a stay at home mom and living with your face in a toilet bowl is not ideal. My fondest memory of this time takes place in the bathroom with my 3 year old who followed me in there as he often does. His new favorite game was mimicking the sound I was making and proudly shouting, “Look, Mommy, I’m getting sick like you! [Houaaaah]” Boys are so sweet, aren’t they? 😉
At 12 weeks my midwife prescribed me 4mg of Zofran. I’ve heard Zofran doesn’t work for everyone, but thankfully this magic, glorious pill helped me. It didn’t completely take away the constant sick feeling, but it took the edge off and made it easier to be somewhat productive again. My nausea slowly lessened and then stopped between 18-20 weeks. So here is a message for all of you pregnant gals out there who are being told that morning sickness will end around 12-13 weeks, but yours doesn’t. Hang in there and you’re not alone! Eat whatever you can keep down and work with your doctors/midwives to make sure you’re staying hydrated. I seriously ate McDonald’s fries all the time because it settled my stomach. Whatever.
Okay so 18 weeks comes along and I’m feeling like a rock star because I’m not getting sick all of the time. I had even started practicing yoga again! Then BAM. The worst pain I’ve felt since child birth creeps into my back, hips and butt. To draw a picture for you. I went from this:
I couldn’t sleep on my side (no a Snoogle does not help!) so I had to try and sleep sitting up. Mostly, I spent my nights doing zombie laps around the house because it felt better to move than to be still. My midwife kind of wrote my pain off telling me “it’s just sciatica” but I knew it was something more than that. We have to trust our intuition and if an alarm bell is going off about something you have to follow your gut. I took matters into my own hands, did a ton of research, spoke to other moms who experienced similar pain during pregnancy and made appointments with three different types of specialists. To describe what’s happening to me in a nutshell:
As my pelvis is shifting, my hips are moving out of alignment and this is causing my piriformis muscle (which is a butt muscle) and other muscles around my hip and in my lower back to spasm because they are working overtime to try and put things back where they should be.
Constant state of muscle spasm = ouchie.
As I mentioned, I’ll be devoting a whole post to this subject in order to share tips on what has been helping to provide some relief. In the meantime, if anyone is feeling pain in this area as a result of being pregnant, please let me know because I want to help!
Rant over 🙂
I had my second ultra sound at Maternal Fetal Medicine on Thursday and it went great! When the perinatologist came in with the two growth charts he said he could have printed out just one because they are identical. Talk about twinning, right? Both babies are measuring exactly 2 pounds, which puts them above the 60th percentile. I don’t want to be a numbers freak or anything, but Cole measured really small for a lot of my pregnancy so I was relieved to see that these babies are growing so well! Whenever I eat I imagine a scene in my belly similar to Pac Man for some reason. Chomp, chomp, chomp.
I’ve been making a conscious effort to eat tons of protein and calcium during the second half of my second trimester to fatten up these cherubs. Besides my usual fruit, veggie, and protein shake cravings I’ve added quite of bit of meat and dairy milk to my diet. I’ve read that weight gain is especially important during weeks 20 – 24 for a twin pregnancy. According to the American Pregnancy Association if a mother of twins gains 24 pounds by the 24th week she reduces her chances of preterm labor. I’m happy to report that I gained 23 pounds by week 24 so I was pretty close!
This pregnancy has once again reminded me how absolutely incredible the female body is. Dr. Kauffman, my Perinatologist (who is fabulous by the way!), explained to my husband and me that a certain demographic of women is more likely to get pregnant with multiples. A few of the characteristics he mentioned are: tall, overweight, and over 35. That describes me perfectly, right?? Growing these babies in my little body has been the most physically challenging experience in my life…and I still have quite a few weeks left! However, I’m so grateful for this miracle that has been given to my family. Here are a couple of 3D shots from our visit.
A moment I witnessed my son having on a brisk fall day inspired me to revisit my blog. I want to hold onto this moment forever and the best way I know how is to write it down.
Cole took his stuffed animals for a walk the other day in his new red wagon. As we strolled down the driveway and took a right onto the street he looked back every once in a while to make sure all his “friends” were still seated in the upright position.
All of a sudden a long gust of wind blew. Cole dropped the handle of his wagon, a huge smile plastered across his face. The wind blew leaves all around him and he started to spin and dance in the middle of the street. He giggled and shrieked uncontrollably, exclaiming, “The wind! The wind, Mommy!” in between spins. The scene lasted only 20 seconds or so, but the joy I witnessed in my son has left an imprint in my heart that will last forever.
From lining up his stuffed animals one by one to breaking out in a spontaneous wind dance in the middle of the street. The yin and yang of a toddler. They expect and trust order and routine, but then there are these unexpected moments of spontaneity that add so much color and joy that you can’t help but join in on the fun.
It’s moments like these that remind me of why I love being a mom so much!
When I was little, I used to think people in their thirties were old. Especially my parents. However, I have distinct memories of Dad and Mom in their thirties doing things like lighting fireworks off between their legs (Dad) and teaching step aerobics classes (Mom). These aren’t things that old people do! I’m not planning on doing either of those any time soon, but I have been thinking a lot about what adventures the next decade will bring.
In four words I can sum up my twenties: college, jobs, husband, son. Short words that represent major milestones. I always felt like I was in a rush to check things off life’s to-do list. In the back of my mind I was always thinking, “Okay, what’s next?” All of the ups and downs, the people that have come in and out of my life, the quiet moments and the loud ones, have led me down a path to discovering who I am. And although we all have our good days and bad days, I’m pretty damn happy where I’ve landed. Yesterday I was 29.
Today I am 30. My intention is to slow down and do more of what I love with the people I love. One of the benefits of being a stay at home mom is that I get to choreograph goofy dances and sing silly songs all the time. I get to discover the inner kid that was buried under years of “Okay, what’s next?” I want to cook delicious meals and take more time to chew my food. I want to see family and friends more often and focus less on the things and people that create negative energy. I want to take risks and try new things. Not because I think it will get me ahead or create some major change, but because it just feels good.
I don’t mean to sound sappy and everyone’s journey is a personal one. I just hope that maybe sharing how I feel about turning thirty might spark a nerve somewhere out there. That maybe we can all shift our focus just a little from where we think we should be to where we are right now. That a small change like that might cause a ripple in our hearts and open us up to finding a little more inner peace. Because that’s where peace lives! It’s not around the corner…it’s in all of us. Right here and right now.
Thank you for reading and have a beautiful day! I’ll be spending the day with this little man and loving every minute! (Well…except the minutes that he’s acting like a crazy toddler…) So I’ll be enjoying some of the day, haha!
We had Cole’s two year check up today at Elliot Pediatrics in Londonderry. Sometimes I wonder whether I should change pediatricians, because there are a lot of practices that are closer to us. But then Dr. Hajduk’s awesomeness reels me right back in and makes me realize the extra ten minutes in the car is totally worth it.
When you have a baby who is born below the 1st percentile in weight, or if your child has any weight gain issues, you tend to be a bit of a numbers freak. Even after two years of happy and healthy check ups, I still get anxious when Cole is sitting on the scale. Thankfully, his numbers place him in the 35th percentile for both weight and height….not that I’m counting 🙂
The biggest news of the day? I took the pacifier away. I promised myself (and my husband) that when Cole turned two, the binky would bounce.
I won’t go through all the gory details, but he was reeeeally angry that he didn’t have that binky to help him fall asleep at naptime. He cried. He whipped himself over his crib railing and onto the floor (ouch). His lovey stuffed animal, Piglet, took a few punches for the cause, but he did fall asleep after about 20 minutes of fussing. I felt so bad that I snuck into his room after he fell asleep, picked him up out of his crib, and rocked him for 20 minutes while he slept in my arms.
Thankfully, he still loved me when he woke up from his nap a couple of hours later. We’ll see how tonight goes. Bedtime is right about….NOW! Wish us luck and a binky-less night.