Please go to sleep

I’ve only been a mom for four months, but I can already speak to how exhausting nighttime is as a parent.  Just when you think you have a routine down and a great sleeper on your hands…BOOM!  The night awakenings sneak back in and you tumble back into a string of sleepless nights.  Sure there are exceptions.  Jealousy rears its ugly head when I hear new parents say things like, “my baby starting sleeping through the night at 2 weeks old!”  Those lucky few are catching plenty of Z’s while the rest of us are testing every sleep solution strategy, swaddle blanket, lullaby, and bedtime story on the market.

I know my little guy isn’t the worst sleeper out there.  Since he was about 2 ½ months old my husband and I have enjoyed at least 4 hours straight of sleep during the night.  Often times it’s up to 5 hours.  We wouldn’t trade our new life with our precious baby boy for anything, but we do find ourselves reminiscing about those Saturday morning sleep fests we used to have!

Have you read the not-for-children children’s book, Go The F*** To Sleep?  Perhaps even more hilarious is the audio version read by Samuel L. Jackson.  Yes, it’s vulgar and a little uncomfortable to read, so if you get offended easily you might want to just skip it and stick with Goodnight Moon.  I even admit to feeling tinges of guilt the first time I read it, but then all I could do was laugh at this silly gag book.  It says in an exaggerated way what a lot of sleep deprived parents are thinking during bedtime routines.  For your reading and viewing pleasure, here is a link to the PDF version of Go The F*** To Sleep, and the audio version with Samuel L. Jackson narrating is below .  If you have any thoughts on this book (good and bad), I’d love to hear them!  And remember this is just a gag, and I would never condone saying anything like this to any child!! Enjoy the evening, and have a good night’s sleep for me 🙂

4 thoughts on “Please go to sleep

  1. I am really suffering at the moment, I would kill for just 5 hours of straight sleep. I have been waking every 2 hours for the past week or so. My partner works so it’s me who’s up doing the breastfeeding. Jesus Christ will it ever change?

    • How old is your little one, Rebecca? Congrats on being a mommy! Getting up every couple hours to breastfeed is tough… Definitely been there. Breast milk digests really fast which is why the babies get hungry so often, especially the first few months. We started sleep training when my baby turned 4 months old. Let me know how old your baby is any maybe I can offer some advice or support!

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